Blue skies 

The demon I know 

Or the unknown 

There is no clear path shown 

I wander away from the demon

Fighting through the trees 

I hope I find blue skies today 

As I continue to walk away 

Nyx

Bleeding inside 

Hopeful for a moment 

Then the pain hit 

I cannot control these emotions 

I wish that I could 

I wish that someone 

Really understood 

How unbearable the pain is 

I sit hear bleeding inside 

Trying to hold on yet again 

I am so tired my friends

I just want it to end 

Nyx

Holding on

I keep my head held high 

Hardening my heart as the day ticks by

Questioning my emotions 

Letting my mind drift 

Listening as the ocean

Pulls in the waves 

Feeling the peace 

That this sound brings 

Holding on to who I am 

As I feel my feet dig into the sand 

Nyx 

When hope leaves you 

I sit here and reflect upon my life 

I question my emotions 

I question my decisions 

I question where I am 

How did I get here 

Where do I go 

Back to the familiar pain 

Or forward to something 

That may be the same 

I feel the panic as it rises 

Unsure which way to place my foot 

Where do you go 

When you have been here before 

What do you do 

When hope leaves you 

Nyx

Beyond my ability

I have always strived to understand 

The actions of those I have known 

The selfishness they have shown 

When they left me there

I have fought to overcome 

What they have done 

The selfishness I see 

Is beyond my ability 

What I do know is that it has hardened me 

It has made me who I am 

For that I am grateful 

Even though I may never understand 

Nyx

Nothing left 

What do you have to be 

To exist in this world 

What do you have to become 

In order to survive it 

What do you do 

When there is nothing left of you 

Nyx 

This monster that you made

I feel my heart stop beating  

I feel myself break in half 

Why am I always left here 

Alone in this place 

How many demons must I conquer

To forget your face 

You have destroyed 

Only to recreate 

It is too late to change 

This monster that you made 

I try to dream 

I try to float away 

Instead I scream

As I drown on the inside

Remembering all the lies 

I try to live in this moment 

But this moment does not last 

What I would not give 

To be able to erase the past

Nyx 

Monotonous life

Each day I rise with hope 

Some days it lasts 

Some days it does not 

Today I hope I find the peace that I seek

I hope that in a few hours 

I do not feel weak 

I hope that deep inside I keep 

Some form of strength left 

Because I feel beaten down 

I feel so weary 

Right now everything I see is dark 

Everything is dreary 

Each day seems the same as the last 

Constantly fighting the past

I live as this broken person 

With a smile plastered on my face

On the inside all I feel is disgrace

Everyday to me is exactly the same 

This monotonous life of pain 

I will try to escape from the pain today 

Let’s see if I succeed 
Nyx

I have lost all hope 

I have moments of peace 

They do not last long 

Then I feel the pain 

As I try to sing along 

Sometimes words may help me

Sometimes they do not 

All I know for sure 

Is peace is all I have ever sought 

No matter how much I have cried 

No matter how much I have fought 

I have yet to find it 

Maybe someday I will 

Maybe someday the earth will stay still 

Just maybe I will find the one 

To make me feel safe from it all

To protect me from harm 

Maybe he will grab my hand 

Before I hit the ground 

At this moment I have no hope 

All I do today is

Find the strength to go on 

Find the strength to cope 

This loneliness will stay 

It must be my eternal debt to pay 

I guess I just have to except it 

This is just the way it is 

I have lost all hope 

That someday I will truly be his 

Nyx

Lost to this world 

I feel numb 

Lost to this world

I am fading 

Fading into nothing 

I no longer care 

About anything at all

All I want to do is free fall 

Free fall to nothing 

Close my eyes 

Feel the air 

Pushing against my skin 

I feel the darkness push me further 

As I slowly disappear 

Farther and farther I fall 

Until I am merely mist in the air 

Darkness pushes me down 

He wants me to disappear 

He wants me to hit the bottom 

This is when peace will come 

This is when I will go back 

Back to where I come from

Nyx

To my readers,

This poem is how I have felt in the past, not today. Thank you all for your continued support. Peace and love. Nyx