For just a moment

As she walks away

The grass dies beneath her feet

The trees are blown from sight

The clouds they turn to grey

As the storm comes

She looks to the sky

As the rain falls

She closes her eyes

For just a moment she feels peace

Nyx

Shut it down

In the end I see

There will be no one beside me

I have to make myself believe

That I will be alright someday

That somehow I can make myself

Shut it down again

All the pain inside

I have to make it stop

Nyx

As I walk through the storm

He made me cry

Before I said goodbye 

There is no perfect mix 

No one who can see 

Who I really am 

Who I strive to be 

I exist and yet I do not 

All my life I have fought 

To find the balance that I need 

In order to push myself 

I need to believe 

That someday I will find 

The one thing that I need 

Someone beside me 

As I walk through the storm

Arms to embrace me 

When I need it the most

I will find you 

This I know is true 

I will not stop

Until I do 

Nyx

Which path

What do I want

Which path do I choose

How will I know

Whether I will win or lose

I fight but I do not know

Whether my feet will hit the ground

Will I stand

Or will I fall

Nyx

Perfection

She strives for perfection

In everything she does

There can be no mistakes

There can be no flaws

Or it will all fall apart

The image she portrays

Will crack and shatter

As she slowly fades away

Nyx

I want to find my home

My whole life I have suffered

When will it end

I am so tired

Of pretending I am ok

I sit here and cry

As another walks away

They come and they go

I throw them out of my life

It is never enough

I need more than they can give

I cannot breathe

As the pain grips my chest

The loneliness a reminder

Of a life lived alone

I just want to find some peace

I want to find my home

Nyx

Within moments

Life is not a straight path

Within moments everything can change

Within a conversation

Within a glance

Within the choice to speak or remain silent

Your path will follow those actions

Without your control

You have to accept it

We have to see

That every decision we make

Leads us to our destiny

Nyx

Everyday I will fight

I breathe in the air

Tell myself to let go

I try to will the anxiety away

I need to stay focused

I need to find my way

I can not give up

I will try again

To pull myself through

I need to find strength in myself

I need to find it deep inside

Because I have nothing left to fear

Because I have nothing to hide

I just have to keep breathing

Until I find the path again

Then I will walk forward

I will find the light

Every day I remember

Every day I will fight

Nyx

What I feel today

At this moment

The agony grips my chest

I woke with hope today

Then it went away

Why do I continue to breathe

Why do I stay

On the inside

I feel myself decay

I feel myself dying slowly

Every single day

I try to fight it

I try to smile

But sometimes I just can not do it anymore

I shield myself in darkness

Hoping for some peace

Only to find the agony

That never goes away

This is what I feel today

Nyx

Wise words

“However difficult life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at.”

Stephen Hawking