Why I exist

Today I felt it all

I shared my tale

Of heartbreak and pain

But I also told them

What it is I fight for

Why I am still here

I have a purpose in this life

That is why I have to live it

Even though I have fallen

Many times before

Even though I will fall again

This i am sure

I will always get back up

Because they need me here

They need someone who can stand up

And take away their fear

They need someone who understands

They need someone to listen

I will be what I need to be for them

That is why I exist

That is who I am

Nyx

Drifting

I used to think that love was the only way

To lead me to my home

But now I feel myself drifting slowly

I do not feel the pull

I have found a way

To walk this world alone

I still feel tinges of the pain

The scars still tear away

And the blood still bleeds through

But I have found a way

To stop searching for you

Nyx

Another place and time

Today I rise with hope

Hoping things will stay this way

Hoping that this time

I will have a hand to hold

There is so much more to me

Then one story to be told

There are many layers

Many scars beneath my skin

If you want to know who I am

The story starts within

I am shaped from betrayal

Pain and many lies

Shaped by those who have come and gone

With no need for goodbyes

If you look at me

I will show you what lies beneath

But only if you take my hand

And wander with me today

Only if you take my hand

And accept me as I am

Broken but still breathing

Mended here and there

I have dreams that keep me going

When it hurts I take myself there

To another place and time

That exists inside my mind

Come with me and you will see

All that is left of me

Nyx

A place for us

Deep within my soul

I know there are pieces left

Parts that will one day make me whole

Someday you will see

That there is so much more to me

Then the girl who walked away

There is so much more to me

Than just one story to be told

One day when I walk the earth

There will be others behind me

I will show them the way

I will show them where there is land

A place for all of us

It exists inside my heart

It is the home of the forgotten

The ones who were once lost

The ones that thought they were dammed

All they needed was compassion

I give to all of you my hand

With all my love,

Nyx

Drifting

I sit here and slip away

My body shuts down

I am lost

But I want to be found

I am reaching out for help today

It is like I am looking back

Yet here I am in the present

This haze of a person with no core self

Please someone help me

Please hold my hand

Please give me the strength

Please give me the foundation

To find the ground

To stop falling

To stand

Nyx

Disclaimer

I appreciate all of my friends here. Thank you for all your kind words, all your support. It means more to me than you could ever know. 💕

Down below

Like a moth to a flame

I fear it will always be the same

I feel my skin as it burns

I watch the world as it turns

It fades from white to black

So quickly the flames grow

Consuming me completely

I have never felt pain so deeply

Then I let myself go

Falling further and further

Down below

Inside the ground

This is where my peace is found

Disclaimer- this is not about dying. It is about letting go, and extinguishing the flame with the earth below.

Peace and Love,

Nyx

Perfection

She strives for perfection

In everything she does

The image she portrays

Hides everything inside

A life she should have lived

Love she was denied

Through this rejection

She never found herself

So she will continue

Wandering here and there

Still striving for perfection

Longing for someone to care

Nyx

Without a home

She exists alone again

There is no one there

To hold her hand

She seeks peace within herself

Because she has no choice

Forward she walks

Into the unknown

Somber still

Without a home

Nyx

For just a moment

As she walks away

The grass dies beneath her feet

The trees are blown from sight

The clouds they turn to grey

As the storm comes

She looks to the sky

As the rain falls

She closes her eyes

For just a moment she feels peace

Nyx

Is it all in my head ?

I feel the sadness as it starts to spread

Is there something wrong

Or is it all in my head

I do not know where I am going

All is feel is my world turning

In my chest I feel the pain

The ache that never goes away

I am lost beyond this world

Everyone goes

No one will stay

When I stop it hits me hard

Bruised and broken

Beaten and scarred

I have to shut it off

I have to leave this place

There is no solace here

I feel my heart

It begins to race

When I see that look

Upon your face

Nyx