Today

Today I question

Everything and everyone

Who am I

Who have I become

I feel so weary

As the anxiety

Brings me down

I feel so lost

I do not want to be found

I do not want to be consumed

By the pain that loneliness brings

By the fire that burns in my chest

I just want peace

I just want to rest

Nyx

Let go

I will not look behind me

I must be here today

I need to let go

Of the sorrows from yesterday

Because this is what must be done

Because this is what I do

Every day I rise

Trying to forget you

You are one of many

That I have to let go

My heart no longer aches

From the sorrow that you bring

The pain subsides

As I start to sing

This is what I must do

Walk away from you

Nyx

I must continue

As I walk along the path

I listen as he speaks

Another person comes and goes

I had a few moments of peace

Before I realized once again

I haven’t found the one

I must continue to protect myself

As weary as I am

I must push myself to wake up

I must make myself stand

Nyx

Peace

As the sun sets

I feel some peace

At last

How I wish that it would stay

When the sun shines I feel the panic

My heart starts to race

These feelings I cannot control

These feelings I cannot face

What do you do

When you can no longer run

You have to look back and see

Everything you have done

Watch yourself as you fell

Into the depths of hell

I am so grateful for this moment

This moment of peace

Nyx

Hope

In my mind I see

No clear path before me

I push forward

Every day

Hoping I will find the way

Hoping that the emptiness will subside

Hoping that the pain will stop

I try to live in each moment

With hope in my heart

That I will find the peace I seek

That I will find my home

Nyx

Move on

I feel the tall grass between my fingers

As I walk along the path

My heartache lingers

As I realize I can never turn back

I see the stream as it flows forward

Centering myself today

I have to live in the moment

I have to keep myself calm

It is the only way

That I can move on

Nyx

The changing season

As the leaves fall around me

I see the beauty in the changing season

Sometimes there is no need to reason

Everything that people do

I try to remember that when I feel pain

I have to look inside myself again

Find the inner beauty of who I am

As I find the ground

I need to walk on again

Nyx

With the rising sun

Sometimes I see flashes 

Memories from before 

I see where I have been 

I see what I have done 

I do not want to see 

These things that haunt me 

All I want is peace 

I want to breathe again 

Hopefully I will find it soon

Before I lose the light from the moon 

I just need to find the way 

Before the moon is gone 

Before the morning comes 

With the rising sun 

Nyx

For the ashes of what once was 

As I walk through the trees 

I feel the breeze 

It is all I have to calm me 

In this moment as I grieve 

For the wishes and dreams I did not receive 

For the ashes of what once was 

For the memories that you gave me 

For the days that I have wept 

For something that was never real

There is no one that can save me 

From the fall that has begun 

There is no one that can reverse 

All the damage you have done 

As the anger subsides 

I find my resolve 

You are just another puzzle 

I was meant to solve 

Nyx

My forever 

In my mind I see fields 

Filled with flowers of color 

Filled with grass so green 

I feel the breeze

Sweep across my face 

Peace fills me in this place 

I see myself as beautiful 

As I walk slowly 

Moving with grace 

This is how I want to see myself 

Smiling in this field 

Forever feeling the breeze 

This is my escape 

This is my home 

Nyx