Drifting

I sit here and slip away

My body shuts down

I am lost

But I want to be found

I am reaching out for help today

It is like I am looking back

Yet here I am in the present

This haze of a person with no core self

Please someone help me

Please hold my hand

Please give me the strength

Please give me the foundation

To find the ground

To stop falling

To stand

Nyx

Disclaimer

I appreciate all of my friends here. Thank you for all your kind words, all your support. It means more to me than you could ever know. đź’•

Down below

Like a moth to a flame

I fear it will always be the same

I feel my skin as it burns

I watch the world as it turns

It fades from white to black

So quickly the flames grow

Consuming me completely

I have never felt pain so deeply

Then I let myself go

Falling further and further

Down below

Inside the ground

This is where my peace is found

Disclaimer- this is not about dying. It is about letting go, and extinguishing the flame with the earth below.

Peace and Love,

Nyx

Perfection

She strives for perfection

In everything she does

The image she portrays

Hides everything inside

A life she should have lived

Love she was denied

Through this rejection

She never found herself

So she will continue

Wandering here and there

Still striving for perfection

Longing for someone to care

Nyx

Without a home

She exists alone again

There is no one there

To hold her hand

She seeks peace within herself

Because she has no choice

Forward she walks

Into the unknown

Somber still

Without a home

Nyx

For just a moment

As she walks away

The grass dies beneath her feet

The trees are blown from sight

The clouds they turn to grey

As the storm comes

She looks to the sky

As the rain falls

She closes her eyes

For just a moment she feels peace

Nyx

Is it all in my head ?

I feel the sadness as it starts to spread

Is there something wrong

Or is it all in my head

I do not know where I am going

All is feel is my world turning

In my chest I feel the pain

The ache that never goes away

I am lost beyond this world

Everyone goes

No one will stay

When I stop it hits me hard

Bruised and broken

Beaten and scarred

I have to shut it off

I have to leave this place

There is no solace here

I feel my heart

It begins to race

When I see that look

Upon your face

Nyx

I will not look back

The world it spins

Round and round I go

In a daze

I feel the pain

I will never be the same

I keep changing

As the leather gets thicker around me

It keeps me safe

I know longer long for anything

I know longer long for anyone

I am a warrior

Alone I walk this path

I know where I am going

I will not look back

Nyx

Today

Today I question

Everything and everyone

Who am I

Who have I become

I feel so weary

As the anxiety

Brings me down

I feel so lost

I do not want to be found

I do not want to be consumed

By the pain that loneliness brings

By the fire that burns in my chest

I just want peace

I just want to rest

Nyx

Let go

I will not look behind me

I must be here today

I need to let go

Of the sorrows from yesterday

Because this is what must be done

Because this is what I do

Every day I rise

Trying to forget you

You are one of many

That I have to let go

My heart no longer aches

From the sorrow that you bring

The pain subsides

As I start to sing

This is what I must do

Walk away from you

Nyx

I must continue

As I walk along the path

I listen as he speaks

Another person comes and goes

I had a few moments of peace

Before I realized once again

I haven’t found the one

I must continue to protect myself

As weary as I am

I must push myself to wake up

I must make myself stand

Nyx