Hoping I make it back to you

Life is an endless array of obstacles

This I know is true

All I do is bear it and keep going

All I do is hope I make it through

These obstacles block the way home

They make me crawl inside myself

Longing to be alone

I always see them coming

These obstacles you see

I brace myself hoping I am wrong

Then I realize I cannot change what is coming

It is my destiny

My fate

There is nothing I can do

It is always too late

It seems some things have been decided

But maybe this is untrue

All I can do is keep moving forward

Hoping I make it back to you

Nyx

All that is left of me 

When he looks at me I see 

Nothing but love looking back at me 

Nothing in this life is certain

As I fight this continuous storm 

What I do know is that he stays by my side 

In this battle he meets my stride 

Whether he is near or far away 

I know he will fight for me 

He is the only one who can see

All that is left of me

Nyx 

I’m a dreamer 

With the ups and downs I see

Hills and mountains laid out before me

Here and there I find a path 

Here and there I find a stream 

Every now and then a valley 

Like a story book from a dream

I cherish these moments 

They are rare 

When I suffer I take myself there 

To my valley

By the stream 

Where the grass is high 

Where the water is blue 

In this place I feel 

Like I am home 

In this place I feel 

That there is nothing 

That I cannot overcome 
Nyx

My feet in the sand

I feel the ocean pull me 

It is like a beacon of light 

I feel the energy surround me 

It is so powerful 

It is so strong 

It is here in this moment 

With my feet in the sand

This is where I belong 
Nyx

Goodbye to yesterday 

In this life so much is uncertain 

So much is unseen 

There is so much doubt 

One thing I do know 

Is that love is real 

I know it when I look in your eyes

I know it when I hear your voice 

I know it when I feel myself 

Being pulled toward you with a force I can not stop 

A force I can not control 

A force so strong that nothing can keep me from you 

There is no doubt 

There is no fear 

There is only love 

Love that I know will only continue to grow

Night after night 

Year after year 

When my heart races I know yours does the same 

When I am in pain I hear you scream my name 

Because you are my other half

The other side of my soul 

Now I know what it feels like to be whole

Now I know what it feels like to have no doubt or fear 

Because I have found you my love 

Because I have found you my dear 

I will hold your hand in mine as we walk together this way 

Together we step in sync as we say goodbye to yesterday 
Nyx

Trust

Through the ups and downs I see

A hand reached out beside me 

I hesitate but take this hand 

Trusting him to catch me before I land 

Away from the light

At this moment all I yearn for is death 

All I yearn for is peace 

Peace from the darkness that haunts me 

Peace from the pain

What I would not give for eternal rest 

To not wake up tomorrow 

To not have to pretend 

To just say good bye to yesterday 

And cease to exist today 

All is do is float past you

In this shadow of forgotten dreams 

Where cob webs have formed 

And cracks run through the floor 

The only thing that is solid is the tomb 

This slab of concrete before me 

Closing me in the dark 

The air is pushed out of me 

As the darkness blows out the light 

At this moment my will is gone 

Today I submit to my friend Darkness

He has come for me 

I let him take my hand as we descend 

Further away from the light 

Darkness is my only friend tonight 
Nyx

Father

I know longer care about life

I know longer care about death

All I have ever wanted was a father

One who loved and protected me

Kept me safe from harm

As time passes

I hope this wish will fade

This dream of him and I

Instead I sit here in agony

Wondering why I feel so empty

Wondering why I feel so lost

My memories a double-edged sword

They bring me strength

They bring me pain

Most of all they show me

What I can never have

What I will never gain

That is the love a father has for his daughter

Unconditional and true

I cannot count how many times I have wished for that father

I cannot count how many times I have wished for you

Nyx

 

I long for peace

I sit here and I dream 

About a life without the pain 

On the inside I just scream 

In my chest it is always the same 

The pain stabs through my heart 

It tears right through my soul 

Taking everything that I am 

Until I lose control 

My mind shuts down 

My stomach turns 

As I grow more weary

I am sick of the dark 

I am sick of the dread 

I do not have voices in my head 

I do not have demons clawing at me 

What I have is only 

Complete and total agony 

On the inside I scream 

With each heartbeat 

With each breath 

I long for peace 

I long for rest 
Nyx

Whispering in my ear 

Sometimes I can not  help but wonder

Do I have a guide

Is there someone always there

Showing me the way

With the right words to say

Whispering in my ear

Telling me there is nothing to fear

Well if I do have a guide I am grateful

Maybe that is how I have come this far

Maybe that is how I have made my choices

Trusting in the unknown

Knowing that my instincts have shown

Everything I have needed to see

Which path to take

Which hand to hold

If you are there my guide

If you have led me this way

Then you saved me today

If you have led me this way

You freed me from it all

If you are there my guide

Thank you for catching me before I fall

Please stay in my heart

Please guide me through

These vines and thorns that prick me

That will someday lead me to you
Nyx