My perception sees wrong intention
Is my perception real
Is this sinking feeling justified
Take take take
That’s what I see
She takes takes takes
Until there is only a shell of me
I used to want to give
But sometimes giving is not enough
I realize today
That sometimes the only answer
Is to walk away
Nyx
I am lost again today
I am just a hole
A black mass
Of never ending nothing
Never ending nothing
Nyx
Today I felt myself fall backward
Into the sadness and the pain
The longing to escape was so great
Even greater than my own self hate
Slowly I took myself away from the darkness
Because I had to
Instead of thinking of the sadness
Instead of thinking of the things I have lost
I thought of the things I do have
I thought of the things I have fought for
Sometimes it feels like I go back to the beginning
The beginning of a journey through hell
I just have to remind myself that I have already been there
I have already come this far
I have to say to myself this darkness
It is not who you are
Nyx
In the end I see
Clear blue skies await me
With every rising sun
As a new day has begun
I have hope in my heart
Hope I did not have before
After every battle I have fought and won
Finally peace finds me with the dawn of this new sun
Nyx
More than I ever have
I have to find the strength
I have to believe
That I can be better
That I can live my life some day
Without the pain I felt before
With every decision I make
With everything that I have left to give
I rise today for you
For those who are as lost as me
I rise again because I must
I have to open the door
So everyone can see
That everyone deserves a chance
To live their lives with happiness
Nyx
You are dead to me
Because that’s the way it needs to be
Get the hell away from me
Before I make you hurt
You don’t want to feel the way that I do
Just get the hell away from me
That’s all I ask of you
Nyx
Seconds pass into minutes
Minutes pass into hours
Hours pass into years
Will I ever really be ok
I have faced my fears
I have seen it all
There is nothing that anyone can do
To stop me today
Time is passing so quickly
Memories are fading away
What I have longed for
I have found
It is my place in this world
I am making my mark
I have been doused in water
But I still carry the spark
The will to save them
The others like me
I will let them see
That they are cared for
I will let them see
The strength I have inside of me
They have always been my home
They are my destiny
Nyx
I have lived a lonely life
Many have come and gone
But Jack my dear you stood out
With all your smiles and your cheer
You became my friend
Within moments of meeting me
It was your actions, not your words
That showed me who you are
A beautiful soul who embraces life
You have walked your own path
Giving me great respect for you
Dear Jack, I believe you are not gone
You live on in my heart
You will live on in each of us
As we walk toward our separate paths
To different places in the world
You gave us another story
About a soul that was so beautiful, so bold
I am grateful to know you
You have reminded me that I am strong
I will keep fighting for both of us
Rest in peace my friend
But this is not the end
Nyx
I used to think that love was the only way
To lead me to my home
But now I feel myself drifting slowly
I do not feel the pull
I have found a way
To walk this world alone
I still feel tinges of the pain
The scars still tear away
And the blood still bleeds through
But I have found a way
To stop searching for you
Nyx
Deep within my soul
I know there are pieces left
Parts that will one day make me whole
Someday you will see
That there is so much more to me
Then the girl who walked away
There is so much more to me
Than just one story to be told
One day when I walk the earth
There will be others behind me
I will show them the way
I will show them where there is land
A place for all of us
It exists inside my heart
It is the home of the forgotten
The ones who were once lost
The ones that thought they were dammed
All they needed was compassion
I give to all of you my hand
With all my love,
Nyx
