Watch me as I stumble

Watch me as I fall

Watch the world crash down around me

Watch me while I say fuck you all

You will never beat me

Because you cannot break

What has already been broken


Through the door

I sit here feeling my chest cave in
Wondering why everything is a fight
When I think it will begin
When I know that something is right
The door is slammed in my face
Why can’t I just erase
The things that keep me from you
Why can’t I just escape from this cage
What else do I need to go through
To get through the door
What else do I need to go through
To get to you


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Layers underneath 

Nothing is ever as it seems

There are always layers underneath 

I can not accept this blind belief 

Deep down I know it will be a fight 

A fight I will win 



In this life there is one thing I have learned for sure

We have more strength then we realize

There is truly nothing we can not endure

I have tied the score 

I am just a shadow of who I used to be

I have changed into someone else 

Someone stronger than I was before 

Because there are things worth fighting for 

I see past the pleasantries 

I see through you all 

Shattered pieces of my past 

That I have fought to surpass 

I am stronger now than I ever was before 

I am winning the battle 

I have tied the score 

We will see who wins tomorrow 

But I have won today 


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I survive that is what I do

I am a survivor, so that is what I do best

Life is never easy, but I take each challenge as it comes

I don’t care what I have to face, or if I will ever get to rest

Keep throwing shit at me

I will keep deflecting it

Someday you will see

That you will never beat me

You may wear me down

You may make me sad

Some days you may feel like you are crushing my soul

Some days you take away my control

But I never fail to fight you back

You may derail me and cause me pain

But I am the one with so much to gain

You give me more strength everyday

By making me continue to fight you

I will never stop, I will never surrender, I will live through you

Because I will survive

That is what I do



The Last Hit 

Days come and go so quickly

 I look back and wonder why 

No matter what they do to me I still get up

I still try 

What is it that pushes me forward 

When it feels like everything holds me down 

What is it that makes me keep moving 

When all I want to do is lay here and continue to drown 

What pushes me is the strength inside my soul

They can try to beat me down 

They can try to make me feel like shit 

But in the end I swear to you I will be the one smiling

I will be the one who gives the last hit


© Nyx0519

My Epitaph

And I walk this road alone

The road with branches along its path

I look back over my shoulder

And I see the writing on my epitaph…

Here lies a woman who fought until the end

Her life was lived to the fullest

Even though everything she did was unplanned

She was loved by many and will always be remembered

As a free spirit with good intentions

As a woman who fought like hell and never surrendered


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And today I wake up and see the warrior underneath

She fights with purpose…without restraint

She strives for her dreams

She will not stop…she will not rest…until she has defeated the demons from her past