Broken

I exist in my own hell

A busted broken shell

I break everyday

Nothing takes the pain away

There is no song that brings lasting peace

There is no wind on my face

There is no ground to walk on

There is nothing anyone can say

Because they all walk away

I wish I did not exist

But here I am

Living this life of pain

I will never be the same

I cannot fix what they have done

I was created and at the moment

My creators have won

I no longer see the beauty of the sun

I no longer see a blue sky

In this moment all I want to

Is die

Nyx

Let go

I barely make it through

Everything that I do

No matter what I have done

I have yet to feel the sun

It does not shine upon my face

There is no warm welcoming embrace

As I find myself here

There is no one near

No one to wipe away my tears

No one to soothe me

No one to shield me from my fears

So, I just fall

Further into the dark

I see nothing in this place

So, I close my eyes

And let go

Nyx

 

Never enough

You cannot fill the void

This hollow shell that I am

It will never be enough

 

Nyx

One of the damned

Will you keep loving me

When you see who I really am

When you see inside

When you find out

I am one of the damned

Nyx

You watched me fade away

I reach for your hand

But you let it go

You watched me fall

You watched me fade away

I would have lived if you had stayed

But I did not matter enough

Disclaimer

When I speak of death it is often a representation of an end. I do not want this to be misinterpreted because I know I have friends on here who care. I appreciate all of you.

Peace and love,

Nyx

A bird with a broken wing

I had to let you go

That short lived feeling

Has long passed

I need to find a way

To be ok today

I need to find a way

To stop the pain again

What the hell do I do

When all I want is to escape

To feel something else

Besides this eternal heartache

I know longer care

If I win or lose

I know longer know

Who I even am

All I have ever done

Is fight to want to live

Without this dream I have

There is nothing left to give

A wanderer is what I am

A warrior as well

I hold my shield up

But my arms they grow weary

And sometimes I take a hit

When I let the shield fall

This is when you see it all

The pain is on my face

The plastered pieces start to crumple

And the fissures and scars all show

This is what I am

A scarred and broken thing

Like a beautiful bird

With a broken wing

I cannot sing

I cannot fly

The truth is that every day

What I long for

Is to simply die

I try to see the beauty in the world

I try to look toward the sky

I try to ask myself questions

I start to wonder why

Peace has not found me

This is when I cry

Nyx

Need to pretend

I would rather suffer

In any other way

Then feel the things I feel

Every single day

It does not stop this cycle

Will it ever end

When will I find peace

When will I no longer

Need to pretend

Nyx

Into the unknown

The cycle it repeats

As the pressure crushes me

Every single day

Sometimes it starts with panic

Sometimes it is the sadness

No matter what it brings

The only way to end it

Is to drift away

Somewhere else I go

Deep inside my mind

Into the unknown

This is the end of me

The piece I cannot see

This is all that is left of me

Nyx

Down below

Like a moth to a flame

I fear it will always be the same

I feel my skin as it burns

I watch the world as it turns

It fades from white to black

So quickly the flames grow

Consuming me completely

I have never felt pain so deeply

Then I let myself go

Falling further and further

Down below

Inside the ground

This is where my peace is found

Disclaimer- this is not about dying. It is about letting go, and extinguishing the flame with the earth below.

Peace and Love,

Nyx