I feel empty
Alone and guarded
Tired of the pain
The others always bring
I often feel
That I am an alien in this world
That I will never really belong here
My smile
My words
I fool you all
I have never been human
I am something else
And I am still here
Every day I wake
Indifferent to each breath I take
Maybe someday the emptiness will fill
Until then here I am
An alien that walks on land
Nyx
Sitting in the dark
Crying again
Letting go of another person
Another strip of my heart is gone
The pain is so great
That I have to shut down
If I didn’t I would break completely
There is no coming back from this
There is no way to change it
I’m still here breathing
Enduring it all
I feel comfort in this time
I have found solitude
I have found solace in the darkness
It is where I belong
There is no human for me
There never will be
Nyx
I can have this hope
That someday I will write to you
And for longer than a few moments
A few precious hours I will not suffer
That hope dies a little more
Every single day
Today is another day
That a piece of me has been stripped away
Left to burn in the flames
Again all I feel right now is pain
Nyx
She suffers in ways
That no one can see
The agony gets swept aside
By the powder she spreads across her face
Covering the darkness
Covering the scars
There is no part left to be seen
She covers it all
Underneath the paint
Underneath the skin
The darkness hides the flame
The fire that keeps her alive
The anger makes her move
When all hope is lost
Everyday a piece is taken
Living her life at this high cost
Broken and bleeding
Mended here and there
How she longs to have been anyone else, anywhere
Her pleas are unheard
Her tears are unseen
She will exist as she is
A plastered doll covered in paint and powder
Living in shame
I hear her as she screams louder
While she burns from within
Nyx
There it is again
That old familiar pain
Taking away another piece of me
What do you do
When all hope is gone
Where do you go
When there is nowhere left
There is nowhere I can feel peace for long
Nowhere that it does not hurt
Everything that is wrong with me
I see it for what it is
There is nothing more I can do right now
This is all I have left to give
My honesty shows the truth
I have never wanted to live
I am still here
Burning on the inside
Living in fear of the pain
What do you want from me
What is left for you to gain
You got what you wanted
Now leave me alone
Nyx
How do I make it stop
How do I escape
This hell that is my fate
Nyx
Will I be alone forever
I fear I must accept my fate
The loneliness it grips me hard
The pain it rips me apart
Once again I wish I was gone
Maybe there is a place I belong
Right now as I cry in the dark
I care about nothing because I cannot
I cannot care because my whole life I have sought
The one thing I will never have
It is just not meant to be
I was meant to live this life alone
All I will ever have is me
Nyx
I exist in my own hell
A busted broken shell
I break everyday
Nothing takes the pain away
There is no song that brings lasting peace
There is no wind on my face
There is no ground to walk on
There is nothing anyone can say
Because they all walk away
I wish I did not exist
But here I am
Living this life of pain
I will never be the same
I cannot fix what they have done
I was created and at the moment
My creators have won
I no longer see the beauty of the sun
I no longer see a blue sky
In this moment all I want to
Is die
Nyx
I would rather suffer
In any other way
Then feel the things I feel
Every single day
It does not stop this cycle
Will it ever end
When will I find peace
When will I no longer
Need to pretend
Nyx
I feel myself fall
Farther and farther
I go
Into the depths below
It never stops
This cycle that is my life
There is no end to this game
I will never be the same
As I lay here broken
Pieces of me slip away
Once again all I feel is pain
Nyx
