When it feels like the world is crashing down

I look to the sky

I breathe in the air

I start to question why

Then I realize that sometimes there is no answer

Sometimes there are no reasons

Looking at the beauty of the world brings me peace

It shows me that there is so much more to life than I see

I am grateful for these moments of clarity

I am grateful that I have the ability to see beyond me


I have tied the score 

I am just a shadow of who I used to be

I have changed into someone else 

Someone stronger than I was before 

Because there are things worth fighting for 

I see past the pleasantries 

I see through you all 

Shattered pieces of my past 

That I have fought to surpass 

I am stronger now than I ever was before 

I am winning the battle 

I have tied the score 

We will see who wins tomorrow 

But I have won today 


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See past the grey

Sometimes you may find

Moments of clarity

They take away the disparity

They take away the pain

Cherish these moments

Cherish what you see

When you see past the grey

It will show you

Where you really want to be

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In the end 

Your past becomes a fog within you 

Underneath the skin 

I have become such a damaged thing 

Like a bird with a broken wing

I walk this world alone 

Broken but yet I move 

The only thing that drives me 

This broken busted thing 

Is that I refuse to give up

I refuse to let you fuckers win 

Bring the lies and the pain 

Give me all you’ve got 

I can take it all you mother fuckers

In the end I will still be standing 

In the end I will still be here 

In the end I am the one 

You are going to fucking fear 



I have tried to drift away into nothing

But something always brings me back

I have tried to drift into the valley of shadow

But something will not let me go

I have tried to escape this shit storm that is my life

But something keeps me here

That something is hope


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I survive that is what I do

I am a survivor, so that is what I do best

Life is never easy, but I take each challenge as it comes

I don’t care what I have to face, or if I will ever get to rest

Keep throwing shit at me

I will keep deflecting it

Someday you will see

That you will never beat me

You may wear me down

You may make me sad

Some days you may feel like you are crushing my soul

Some days you take away my control

But I never fail to fight you back

You may derail me and cause me pain

But I am the one with so much to gain

You give me more strength everyday

By making me continue to fight you

I will never stop, I will never surrender, I will live through you

Because I will survive

That is what I do



The Last Hit 

Days come and go so quickly

 I look back and wonder why 

No matter what they do to me I still get up

I still try 

What is it that pushes me forward 

When it feels like everything holds me down 

What is it that makes me keep moving 

When all I want to do is lay here and continue to drown 

What pushes me is the strength inside my soul

They can try to beat me down 

They can try to make me feel like shit 

But in the end I swear to you I will be the one smiling

I will be the one who gives the last hit


© Nyx0519

Tidal Waves

And everything came crashing down

With the force of tidal waves crashing into the shore

My life was erased and what existed was no more

What do you do when you lose everything

What do you do when it is all gone

You build a new foundation to stand on



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My Epitaph

And I walk this road alone

The road with branches along its path

I look back over my shoulder

And I see the writing on my epitaph…

Here lies a woman who fought until the end

Her life was lived to the fullest

Even though everything she did was unplanned

She was loved by many and will always be remembered

As a free spirit with good intentions

As a woman who fought like hell and never surrendered


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Dreams # 2

Some days I want more than others for my dreams to be real 

Here I sit and ponder what I will do when I can…

Take off and see the world 

Then decide where I land 



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