Dreams

I dream of a world beyond what I see before me

I dream of a world filled with beauty

I dream of a world of peace

Nyx

Exist as I am

It is hard to ignore this loneliness

I feel this need for connection

A connection to someone else

In the meantime I lay here

Listening as the clock keeps ticking

Aware of time that is passing by

Knowing that being here alone is not enough

But accepting it anyway

This is what is best

I will keep trying to be better

I will exist as I am

Nyx

This face

What have I become

Who was I before

I do not recognize

This face I see reflected at me

Maybe I am already

Everything I was meant to be

Nyx

Will I find myself again

I wake up feeling this tension

It wraps around my heart

I wake up with good intention

But I feel this anxiety

It is there as soon as I wake

Can I get through this day

Without feeling my heart break

Can I get through this day

Feeling better at the end

Will I find myself again

Nyx

I do not walk alone

All this time I thought I was walking alone

I was wrong

There has always been a presence beside me

This presence that is trying to guide me

Guide me towards my purpose

Guide me towards peace

There is a purpose for this pain

I am reassured by this

In everything that I do

Sometimes I have to listen

Sometimes I have to see

Sometimes I have to feel

Sometimes it is just a thought

I always find the answer

I always find a way

Because my guide is beside me

Every single day

Nyx

Image source geckzilla on Flickr

Facing fear

This was the first year of my life

That I stopped the cycle

The cycle that led me back

To the high of the chase

Then the low from the agony

There has been a void

That my mind used to fill

I have lived this year

Facing the thing I fear the most

I am alone

Nyx

Humbled

A path I thought was certain

Is no longer there for me

I know I must accept this

But the anxiety burns my chest

I was so sure of myself

So sure of who I would be

So sure of what I would do

It filled me with joy

These thoughts of the path I always dreamed of

I did not see this loss

After coming this far I had no doubts

Yet humbled I have become

Reminded that this is a fight I have not won

So quickly things can change

So quickly hope can lead to pain

I have to find a new path

I have to learn from this

I have to accept this failure

See it for what it is

This was not meant to be

I cannot let this failed dream beat me

Nyx

A warrior with a voice

I feel pride in how far I have come

I have fell down more times than I can count

But I do get up eventually, and after every fall

I remember who I am now

What I have grown into

A warrior with a voice so loud and clear

That people listen now

A voice so loud and clear

That strength and passion flows through me

Maybe someday I will get to where I need to be

As long as I keep getting up I believe I will succeed

Nyx

Faith

Uncertainty ruled my thoughts today

But self reflection guided me

Onto a better path

It showed me what I needed to see

There is no certainty in the steps we take in life

But there is faith in a future that can be bright

Nyx