Shut it down

In the end I see

There will be no one beside me

I have to make myself believe

That I will be alright someday

That somehow I can make myself

Shut it down again

All the pain inside

I have to make it stop

Nyx

Perfection

She strives for perfection

In everything she does

There can be no mistakes

There can be no flaws

Or it will all fall apart

The image she portrays

Will crack and shatter

As she slowly fades away

Nyx

Loneliness is what I fear

The pain

It comes and goes

Hits me in waves

Sometimes it lasts for hours

Sometimes it lasts for days

Until I shut it down

It is often soothed

By the sound of someone else

Or the sound of music

Playing in my head

Sometimes when the pain is gone

All I feel is dread

Loneliness is what I fear

Night after night

Year after year

I do not want to be alone

I want to find my home

Nyx

No one

I feel the sadness

It is coming on

I do not know why

I do not know how to fix it

All I want to do is cry

I am not as strong

As I want to be

Because I can not live

Without someone beside me

This makes me weak

This person that I seek

I just want to be strong

I just want to move on

Alone with no one

Nyx

On my own

I am still floating in the air

I will not know where I am going

Until I get there

What do you do

When the world crashes down

Where do you turn

When no ones around

I keep walking forward

Somehow I do

Some days are so hard

Just to live through

Maybe some day I will find my home

Until then I will continue to walk forward

On my own

Nyx

My heart a broken stone

And another walks away

Like so many have before

That is just what they do

Before I feel the knife slam through

The loneliness and the pain

It always feels the same

Who have I become

I exist and yet

I am no one

I walk this world alone

My heart a broken stone

The cracks they chip away

A little more each day

This is the way it must be

Until there is nothing left of me

Nyx

What am I looking for

As another door closes

I look out to the sea

What am I looking for

What will set me free

Nyx

Illusions

There is no path

Laid clear before me

I want my heart to race

I want to feel pride

I no longer want to worry

I no longer want to feel

What I want is reason

And everything that is real

I have seen so many illusions

Along the path I have chosen

I will not delude myself

I will not have faith again

I know that all I will ever need

Is me in the end

Nyx

Another scar

With you gone

I feel so lost

I had no idea

That such a short time

Could have such a cost

I fight through the pain

Trying to find myself again

Hoping I can make it through today

I know that harsh words create fractures

I had no idea how fast we would shatter

How quickly you would turn from me

As if I never mattered

Even though the pain is raw

At least I saw who you really are

Now I just carry another scar

Nyx