Holding on

I keep my head held high 

Hardening my heart as the day ticks by

Questioning my emotions 

Letting my mind drift 

Listening as the ocean

Pulls in the waves 

Feeling the peace 

That this sound brings 

Holding on to who I am 

As I feel my feet dig into the sand 

Nyx 

When hope leaves you 

I sit here and reflect upon my life 

I question my emotions 

I question my decisions 

I question where I am 

How did I get here 

Where do I go 

Back to the familiar pain 

Or forward to something 

That may be the same 

I feel the panic as it rises 

Unsure which way to place my foot 

Where do you go 

When you have been here before 

What do you do 

When hope leaves you 

Nyx

In your arms 

I lay here wishing I could be 

In your arms my love 

Forever wrapped around each other 

With nights filled with kisses 

And the warmth of your embrace 

When I look in your eyes

I see your love reflect back upon my face 

My love I am so grateful 

Every time I look in your eyes

Every time I feel your arms around me 

Every time you see the pain 

And softly speak my name 

I will keep on wishing 

Until you come back to me 

In your arms is the only place 

I ever long to be 

Nyx

How I breathe today 

When I reflect

When I stop

When I think about

Where I come from

All I feel is pain

An agony so piercing

An agony so deep

It is all consuming

This agony I feel

What I wouldn’t give

For it not to be real

These images of my past

And all the pain that they bring

Thankfully they do not last

Because I shut them away

This is how I survive

This is how I breathe today

Nyx

All that is left of me 

When he looks at me I see 

Nothing but love looking back at me 

Nothing in this life is certain

As I fight this continuous storm 

What I do know is that he stays by my side 

In this battle he meets my stride 

Whether he is near or far away 

I know he will fight for me 

He is the only one who can see

All that is left of me

Nyx 

I see the light 

Through the ups and downs I see

A bright light before me

A light that beckons me to follow

It is there no matter how far I have fallen

It is there no matter where I go

I know it will still exist

This light is there

Even as I fall

Into the depths of hell

Under the tides of the sea

Under the covers at night

With my eyes closed tight

I can still see the light

Nyx

Float away 

I feel my skin burn within 

I feel my heart shatter 

I cannot help but ask myself 

Why does anything matter 

I try to make it through each day 

I try to hold my head high

I show a smile upon my face 

A smile that isn’t real 

All I want is peace from this life 

I no longer want to feel 

I wish that I was ignorant to everything 

I wish that I was ignorant to everyone 

I wish that I was dumb 

What I wish for the most is 

The ability to stay numb 

To be lost to this world forever 

To float away in the sky 

To say, so long and farewell 

Just to say goodbye 
Nyx

My guardians of the night 

I write these lines to my guardians 

For the people who saved my life 

I will never forget you 

I owe my strength 

I owe my hope in humanity 

To each and every one of you 

To those who have fought for me 

For those who stood beside a lost child 

For those who showed me empathy 

I will never forget you 

In my heart you will always have a place 

Each and every one of you 

I will never forget your face

You have made me want to believe 

That angels do exist in this life 

For the few who fight for what is right 

You are my guardians of the night 
Nyx

I’m a dreamer 

With the ups and downs I see

Hills and mountains laid out before me

Here and there I find a path 

Here and there I find a stream 

Every now and then a valley 

Like a story book from a dream

I cherish these moments 

They are rare 

When I suffer I take myself there 

To my valley

By the stream 

Where the grass is high 

Where the water is blue 

In this place I feel 

Like I am home 

In this place I feel 

That there is nothing 

That I cannot overcome 
Nyx

Goodbye to yesterday 

In this life so much is uncertain 

So much is unseen 

There is so much doubt 

One thing I do know 

Is that love is real 

I know it when I look in your eyes

I know it when I hear your voice 

I know it when I feel myself 

Being pulled toward you with a force I can not stop 

A force I can not control 

A force so strong that nothing can keep me from you 

There is no doubt 

There is no fear 

There is only love 

Love that I know will only continue to grow

Night after night 

Year after year 

When my heart races I know yours does the same 

When I am in pain I hear you scream my name 

Because you are my other half

The other side of my soul 

Now I know what it feels like to be whole

Now I know what it feels like to have no doubt or fear 

Because I have found you my love 

Because I have found you my dear 

I will hold your hand in mine as we walk together this way 

Together we step in sync as we say goodbye to yesterday 
Nyx