When my soul is gone 

Sometimes despair drags me down 

Through this haze of memories 

Through years of turmoil 

My body sinks 

Until it is anchored down 

Then the rooms fills with water 

As I lay chained to the ground 

Once again I gulp for air 

Until I can no longer breathe 

This is when the emptiness comes 

This is when my soul is gone 

Nyx

Jackal with a latch 

I wake up and I wait to see 

Where these next few steps will take me

I am walking away from the life I lived before 

To walk alone again once more 

There are no serpents in the grass 

Just a jackal with a latch 

I must be careful as I make my move 

I must brace myself and keep my head held high 

Today is the first day of my official good bye 

Nyx

Dead Inside

I wish I knew what was wrong with me

Sometimes I wish that I couldn’t see

I wish I was blind to everything

I wish I was blind to everyone

I just want to escape this life

I just want to be someone else

I don’t want to feel this pain anymore

I don’t want to feel anything at all

What is it that I am fighting for

Is it freedom, or is it something more

Maybe I will find the answer

Or maybe I will never get that far

I guess it doesn’t really matter

I am still locked inside a cage

With agony trapped inside

Mixed with sorrow and with rage

Here I am again, back and forth I go

I would love to feel peace for just a moment

I would love for my heart rate to slow

I give up on hopes and wishes

I give up on dreams today

I just want to lay here tonight

Dead inside as I wait for the sun to rise

 

Nyx

Music # 2

My mind races

As my heart paces

My thoughts a jumbled mess

I try to still my mind…try not to think about the stress

I need my music…I need to sing

This is my solace…my music…my voice

I feel trapped…I feel contained

I want someone to release me

I am so grateful for the sound and the passion that music brings

In this moment I am free