Holding on

I keep my head held high 

Hardening my heart as the day ticks by

Questioning my emotions 

Letting my mind drift 

Listening as the ocean

Pulls in the waves 

Feeling the peace 

That this sound brings 

Holding on to who I am 

As I feel my feet dig into the sand 

Nyx 

Nothing left 

What do you have to be 

To exist in this world 

What do you have to become 

In order to survive it 

What do you do 

When there is nothing left of you 

Nyx 

In a million ways 

My darling 

I just want you to know 

That for a million days 

In a million ways 

My love for you will only continue to grow 

You have become my sunshine 

After the storm

You have become my moonlight 

Showing me the way each night

You have become my peace 

When everything spins out of control 

You have become my everything 

You are the other half of my soul

Nyx 

This monster that you made

I feel my heart stop beating  

I feel myself break in half 

Why am I always left here 

Alone in this place 

How many demons must I conquer

To forget your face 

You have destroyed 

Only to recreate 

It is too late to change 

This monster that you made 

I try to dream 

I try to float away 

Instead I scream

As I drown on the inside

Remembering all the lies 

I try to live in this moment 

But this moment does not last 

What I would not give 

To be able to erase the past

Nyx 

Never slowing down

As my world spins and spins around me

My thoughts a shattered mess

I stop to think to myself

When is the next test

Waiting for the next battle

Never resting

Never slowing down

I only feel peace

When I listen to the sound

The music soothes my ranting mind

When I am chained and  bound

By everything that crashes through my head

When I think to myself I would be better off dead

When I want to be surrounded by nothing

I find the one thing that makes me feel human

The one thing that is always there

Peace is what I find

When music soothes my mind

Nyx

As my heart peels away

I watch as the sun rises 

I watch as the sun sets 

I can not help but wonder 

Is this as good as it gets 

These moments here and there 

These moments when I find my way 

These moments when I write to you 

When I show you the way 

I wear my heart on the outside 

I do not hide it within 

This is why I am so damaged 

Because we live in a world 

Plagued by sin 

This is when I feel the pain 

When I think of all the loss 

When I think of what they have gained 

This is when I lose the hope 

That my heart will stay full 

That my true nature will remain 

With everything I lose 

With everything they gain 

Some days I feel myself slip 

Into something else 

Into a creature fighting to live 

Into a creature with nothing left to give 

Sick and tired of the evil of man 

Sick of fighting for everything that I am 

It is so hard to keep hope in my heart 

When everyone takes a strip 

Tearing it apart 

There are a few pieces left of me 

Still out there for the world to see 

My weakness is known 

My honesty is shown 

My layers of beauty hide the scars 

They hide the peeled back strips 

They hide the darkness 

The darkness that is starting to show

I fear I will never stop fighting 

I fear I will never stop feeling 

These strips they just keep peeling

I fear one day there will be nothing left 

I fear that even the shell of who I was 

Will wither away and just be gone 

I wonder at this moment 

If my soul will let me move on 

Nyx

I’m a dreamer 

With the ups and downs I see

Hills and mountains laid out before me

Here and there I find a path 

Here and there I find a stream 

Every now and then a valley 

Like a story book from a dream

I cherish these moments 

They are rare 

When I suffer I take myself there 

To my valley

By the stream 

Where the grass is high 

Where the water is blue 

In this place I feel 

Like I am home 

In this place I feel 

That there is nothing 

That I cannot overcome 
Nyx

Break the silence 

Sometimes I think that I am beaten 

Sometimes I think that I am done 

That is when I stop and remember 

Everything that you have done 

These actions drive me forward 

These memories that you made 

You were the one I trusted 

My life was in your hands 

Everything I did to make you proud of me 

Everything I did I wanted you to see 

I was your daughter 

I was the one you were supposed to protect 

Instead all you did was lie to me 

Confuse me with truths mixed with lies 

Until all I wanted was to escape you 

Everything I have done 

Is a result of what you did 

Everything I do 

Is a fight to beat you

You are the reason I am who I am 

Yet you are the reason I still breathe 

You are the reason I stand

Well dear father someday you will see

What you created 

What you made 

Someday you will see 

That you will never beat me 

I may be bruised 

My bones may break 

I may wake up everyday and suffer 

From eternal heartache 

But when all is lost I see what you have done 

This is what drives me forward 

This is what makes me carry on 

I will fight for those born to suffer 

What you have put me through 

I will fight through the pain 

I will fight because I have no choice 

There was no turning back when I broke the silence 

There was no turning back when I used my voice 
Nyx

My feet in the sand

I feel the ocean pull me 

It is like a beacon of light 

I feel the energy surround me 

It is so powerful 

It is so strong 

It is here in this moment 

With my feet in the sand

This is where I belong 
Nyx

Goodbye to yesterday 

In this life so much is uncertain 

So much is unseen 

There is so much doubt 

One thing I do know 

Is that love is real 

I know it when I look in your eyes

I know it when I hear your voice 

I know it when I feel myself 

Being pulled toward you with a force I can not stop 

A force I can not control 

A force so strong that nothing can keep me from you 

There is no doubt 

There is no fear 

There is only love 

Love that I know will only continue to grow

Night after night 

Year after year 

When my heart races I know yours does the same 

When I am in pain I hear you scream my name 

Because you are my other half

The other side of my soul 

Now I know what it feels like to be whole

Now I know what it feels like to have no doubt or fear 

Because I have found you my love 

Because I have found you my dear 

I will hold your hand in mine as we walk together this way 

Together we step in sync as we say goodbye to yesterday 
Nyx