The panic hits me
Then I crash
I cannot control it
There is no turning back
It starts like a tidal wave
Rising and turning
My chest starts to pound
Then it starts burning
I breathe in the air
I listen for a sound
I feel the world close in around me
As the air leaves my lungs
I have no control
Today it has won
Nyx
I wake up and try to think
I can do this today
I can will the anxiety away
I try not to worry about tomorrow
I try not to worry about yesterday
Somehow this doesn’t matter
No matter what I tell myself
No matter what you say to me
Anxiety, It takes away the words you say
It takes away my rational mind
Until there is nothing left
But this electricity is wired around me
It is my bind
If only I could find a way to escape it
Before I completely lose my mind
Everything is worse to me than it seems
But maybe I can rest again in my dreams
Nyx
As my world spins and spins around me
My thoughts a shattered mess
I stop to think to myself
When is the next test
Waiting for the next battle
Never resting
Never slowing down
I only feel peace
When I listen to the sound
The music soothes my ranting mind
When I am chained and bound
By everything that crashes through my head
When I think to myself I would be better off dead
When I want to be surrounded by nothing
I find the one thing that makes me feel human
The one thing that is always there
Peace is what I find
When music soothes my mind
Nyx
I wish I could calm my beating heart
I wish I could will the anxiety away
I wish I wasn’t so focused on being the best
Sometimes I just cannot control myself
I wish my body and mind would just give me some peace and let me rest
Sometime I just want to escape the world
Disappear into nothing
But mania brings me forward, makes me stand
My mania spins me round and round
People around me are sick of the sound
My words are too fast
I speak too much
I’m crazy to some
Intriguing to others
I pull people toward me like a drug
Regardless what they think I am, or what they say
Mania…Sadness, my mind is lost
Indifference…apathy…this is my truth
Except it and come toward it…or run away
I honestly don’t care what you do…either come toward me or stay away
Words From The Borderline 
You must be logged in to post a comment.