The void

Once again I exist in the darkness

Hiding from the world

Ashamed of what I look like

Ashamed of my lack of control

Emptiness and loneliness

Is all I feel today

In this void of nothing

This void that never ends

Nyx

Trapped in hell

I hear the gate slam

As I fall into the flames

All I feel is emptiness and pain

I lie in the darkness

No longer wanting to exist in this world

With the gate slammed shut

I find my resolve

I have accepted my fate

I can not save myself

From my own mind

I just want to feel the flames

For the last time

Nyx

Addictions

Push him out

Let him in

Push him out

Let him in

Pain

Emptiness

More pain

I wish I could change

but I’ll probably just stay the same

I had a taste of my addiction

Now it’s gone

I just want to be dead

Nyx

Walk away

I see those eyes

Glare through the night

The blue so beautiful and bright

Beyond those eyes

A hollow soul lies

With no empathy or emotion

No capability of devotion

A predator waiting for prey

He eats you

Then tosses you away

You will pine for him

Because he draws you in

His fake smile shows no remorse

Because he does not care about you

He will rip you apart

Then tear out your heart

You will be left there to bleed

Until you gain the strength

To quench the need

And walk away

Nyx

Pain

I feel myself fall

Farther and farther

I go

Into the depths below

It never stops

This cycle that is my life

There is no end to this game

I will never be the same

As I lay here broken

Pieces of me slip away

Once again all I feel is pain

Nyx

Pandora’s box

I sit here numb

To everything around me

I feel the world cave in

As I look down at the water

I feel the apathy

As I make my choice

A choice I have made before

With every closing door

I take one last moment

To let myself feel the pain

It cuts so deep

I will never be the same

I look at the sky

Before I jump

Into the cold water below

This is where I belong

So this is where I go

When all is lost

I will take myself there

To Pandora’s box

Hoping for the darkness

Hoping for some peace

Hoping that this time

I do not come back

I just want the darkness

I just want to see the sky

I just want to see the sea

Then I want to die

Nyx

Hope lies within my dreams 

I am sitting here 

Alone again 

Silent and still 

I wish I could say 

That I am fine 

But I would only be lying 

Let them sleep 

As I bury the pain again

Let the apathy set it 

So I can wake up again tomorrow 

I feel the emptiness fill me 

As I listen to the sounds of the night 

As I embrace the serenity of the darkness 

And find comfort in the stars 

In a few hours a new day will start 

Once again I am reminded 

What being alone means 

I am lost in my own world 

Where hope lies within my dreams 

Nyx 

Lost to this world 

I feel numb 

Lost to this world

I am fading 

Fading into nothing 

I no longer care 

About anything at all

All I want to do is free fall 

Free fall to nothing 

Close my eyes 

Feel the air 

Pushing against my skin 

I feel the darkness push me further 

As I slowly disappear 

Farther and farther I fall 

Until I am merely mist in the air 

Darkness pushes me down 

He wants me to disappear 

He wants me to hit the bottom 

This is when peace will come 

This is when I will go back 

Back to where I come from

Nyx

To my readers,

This poem is how I have felt in the past, not today. Thank you all for your continued support. Peace and love. Nyx