When I take my last breath

As the darkness consumes me

I lose all sight and hope

I can no longer see

What is behind, beside, or in front of me

It pulls me down deeper and deeper

Takes away my will to live

There is nothing I would not give

To not be me today

There is nothing I would not give

To have never lived at all

I am still alone

This I know is true

There is nothing that anyone can say

Nothing that anyone can do

That can truly bring me peace

I fear I will only find it

When my body can no longer take the pain

Burning in my chest

I fear I will only find it

When I take my last breath

To my readers and the people who care about my posts,

When I write, it is not always literal, it is not always about the present. Please do not interpret this literally. I only say this, because I know that I have readers who think that what I write is always at this moment, and that is not the case. I will not always say when or where or how these poems come to me. I always appreciate everyones empathy, concern, and happiness when I post my poems. Please keep in mind that these posts are not always what they seem, they are not always literal, and they are definitely not always present day.  Please know that I appreciate everyone who enjoys my writing, I just think this needed to be said. To everyone who reads and supports my poems I appreciate the hell out of you. 

Peace and Love,

Nyx

Rip it out

Unbearable pain

Stabs me

Over and over again

Agony

It is so hard to endure

I just can’t take it anymore

This torture, this pain

Floods through me

Rips me apart

Strips it all away

Punches a whole and rips out my heart

Just finish me off

Why prolong this pain

There is nothing left of me

Nothing left for you to gain

Please just put me out

I welcome the dark

I don’t care where I go

I don’t care what I see

Please just free me from this fucking agony

Fade Away

I am so lost and alone

I want to fade away into nothing

I want to stop existing

Feel no pain

Have no thought

Just a shadow 

Lost forever in the dark

Take all that I have

Take all that I was

I no longer care

Crush out the spark

Crush out my hope

Crush my dreams

Just let me go

Give me peace

I want to feel my breath grow shallow

I want to feel my body drift away

Even my love does not see

That there is nothing left of me

When one can sleep so soundly

While the other suffers so

It makes me want to tell darkness

To just take the spark, blow it out, and let me go

Nyx

 

 

Slipping Away

At this moment I care about nothing

I fall into the darkness willingly

Waiting for the arms of my darkness to embrace me

I feel myself slip away from this world and fall into his

In the end he is always there

Waiting for me to see, that there is no one else

Just him and me

Nyx

Image Source http://melisica.com

As the rocks crumple

As the rocks crumple beneath my feet

As the sun sets

I try to keep the darkness out of my head

But he always finds a way in

Like a serpent he latches on and then burrows within

No matter what I say or do

He never gives up, he always breaks through

Once again I have accepted my darkness as part of who I have become

Maybe I am better off embracing him now

Better off then I was when I was running away from where I come from

Nyx

Image Source http://abduction.ml